August 27th, 2008 | by Shelli Stevens |
So I went out with a friend last night to a local brewery we just adore. People are laid back, friendly, and the food/beer is good. We go to chat and people watch. I love to people watch. It’s great inspiration for stories.
Well, during my people watching, I noticed this table of men in front of me. They were all probably 50′s/60′s. So this cute waitress walks by and one older man leans out to watch her pass by. Then I hear him say to his friends, “She has a cute ass.” Now that didn’t really bother me so much. He’s a guy. Men of all ages look. But then he just had to go and follow that up with, “She’s about my daughter’s age.” And I kind of wanted to throw up a little in my mouth. Please. Don’t talk about some chick’s ass and your daughter in the same breath.
This all led to a discussion between me and my friend. Like, are you ever too old to stop looking? Or as you age should you raise the age bracket of guys/gals that you are checking out? As I get older I’ve noticed that my age range of men I check out has aged with me. I can’t check out a little nineteen year old anymore. I sit there and think…you’re probably the same age as the kid I used to change diapers on when I babysat.
I always seem to have a limit. Though every once in awhile I make an exception. My friends have no issues, often. Like my friend Karen who proudly lusts after that Transformers actor Shia Leboeuf and loves to joke about being Shia’s baby mamma.
I just wonder if some day the lusting will fizzle out. Will I give it all up to play Scrabble and forget that I ever wrote really sexy stories? Forget I ever cared about multiple orgasms and toe curling kisses? Or will I be that elderly granny pinching a cute waiter’s butt at a restaurant?
More so, will you?
I am a dirty old woman. Shia is younger than my baby brother. So it’s a little sick and wrong. But I still wear my lust for him proudly.
I hope I don’t lose the lusty thoughts! Maybe we can get kicked out of the restaurant for pinching the cute waiter’s butt…
by Karen Erickson · August 27th, 2008 at 12:17 amI’ve noticed that my age bracket has totally gone up as I’ve gotten older. I’ll give a glance to a cute younger guy but don’t lust after them as I would if I were say, I don’t know…maybe like 6-7 years ago. Damn, I feel like an old lady!! LOL!
Oh…and those dirty old men behind us were like seriously gross and after their comment, I too wanted to throw up a little in my mouth! But it was still hella fun(and yesm I used the old school word hella…it needs to make a comeback! LMAO!)
by Danielle Redmond · August 27th, 2008 at 12:46 amKaren, Shia’s been getting me a wee bit excited lately too. He’s got that edge. Mmm.
Dani, it was hellu fun tonight! We need to get out more. Mmm. Stone grilling.
by Shelli Stevens · August 27th, 2008 at 1:07 amEek–I think it’s the making me think about how you could be related that is kind of yucky… I don’t mind so much the theory of being so much older, but don’t bring up any possible relationships–that’s just squicky! Glad you had a fun night out regardless!
by Fedora · August 27th, 2008 at 9:51 amHi Fedora!
Thanks! It was fun! And yes, the related connection is just too squicky.
by Shelli Stevens · August 27th, 2008 at 11:02 amI can answer a define ‘Yes!’ to that question. I am indeed a dirty old man. It keeps me young.
I will admit my ‘check-em-out’ age bracket has advanced along with my years. Under thirty is generally going to get a ‘Meh, whatever from me’. Under twenty five is skirting pedophilia in my opinion.
A lot of kinks can be laid at my feet but that isn’t among them.
by Rob Graham · August 27th, 2008 at 11:33 amWell, I’ve always noticed Men as opposed to boys, so yes, my age bracket has advanced with my own.
Kind of like the way police were always older: now my kid wants to be one! And like doctors had white hair: now my doctor and I complain about needing glasses to read and adjusting the lighting just so.
Rats! Yeah, Shelli, thanks for the rosy thought of the day.
by Bonnie Edwards · August 27th, 2008 at 12:41 pmRob, that’s true. Flirting and being a little dirty can keep you young!
LOL, Bonnie! Well, for me, it was always actresses seemed so old. And now they’re all younger than me. A real kicker is when I look at Obama. I’m like…is he old enough to be president? His kids are not much older than mine!
by Shelli Stevens · August 27th, 2008 at 12:56 pmI have a son who is almost twenty-shriek! so I definitely set my sights older than him these days
I have limits…:)
by Kate Pearce · August 27th, 2008 at 1:32 pmOh see! Yeah, Kate, that must be interesting. So Shia could be your son’s best friend. LOL.
by Shelli Stevens · August 27th, 2008 at 1:43 pmI just can’t check out younger men. I don’t know why. I’m 36. Anyone under, say, ummm, maybe 34 just seems too young. It has taken me a helluva long time to get to where I am in life and young guys are simply too stupid. Sorry, but true. I find myself being more interested in older men – like late 40′s to early 50′s. They seem to appreciate women more. They usually have their shit together by then too. I don’t want to be a mother to some young guy. Because, lord knows, most of them need one. I must admit though, sometimes if I see some hot, young construction hunk, I inhale a little deeper and a rush of little tingles quickly rushes over me, but it quickly disappears. Oh, and yes, you will so be that dirty old granny, still writing erotica when you are like 80. Your grandkids will think you just rock!
by Jammie · August 27th, 2008 at 1:52 pmJammie, I’ve really had the problem with younger men too, quite often. Hence the reason I’ve looked up. But then, hmm, 7 years up didn’t seem to be quite enough either
And my grandkids might think it’s cool, but I bet my kid will still be like ‘omg mom, you’re so gross!’ LOL.
by Shelli Stevens · August 27th, 2008 at 2:44 pmI think I’m totally going to be a dirty old woman like that Maxine on the Hallmark cards…lol.
I can look at and appreciate all hotties 18+ and often do, but when my son hits 18, I will NEVER be putting them in the same sentence like the sicko at the brewery!!
In my head, I think I’ll be in my late twenties forever–only I’m a lot smarter now than I was, and I enjoy every second of my internal debauchery…hell, just read my books and you’ll know what I mean…lol!
However, my internal fantasy life is very different than my external real actions. I may very well be an eighty year old woman pinching cute waiters on the butt someday, but I won’t be one of those who goes home with one…EWWWW! I have my hottie younger husband (9 years), so he’ll remain my boy toy and keep me out of trouble…lol!
Cassie
by Cassie Ryan · August 27th, 2008 at 2:46 pmHmmm I’ve always liked the older man, but now the guys I lusted after when I was younger are kicking the bucket or dating sticks *cough, cough Harrison*
I think 15 years is pretty acceptable, but that’s because that was all I was allowed when I wrote my Oh Yum! LOL!
by Amy · August 27th, 2008 at 5:10 pmI’ve had issues with younger guys in the past as well which is why my age bracket strictly begins at 27-28 and ends at 41-42. Ten to eleven years older is the max that I’ll go these days but I’m sure that it could change the older I get! LOL!
Hell, my mom got a younger man in my dad…she’s 6 years older than him!
Shell…we do have to get out more but here’s to us gettin out last night and havin a great time, even though we had to sit by dirty old men! LMAO!
by Danielle · August 27th, 2008 at 5:56 pmOh, my. Since I’m almost sixty and still writing REALLY sexy books, wonder where this puts me? And yes, I still like to look at the cute guys, but to me they don’t start looking good until they’re at least in their late thirties–any younger and they just have such an “unformed” appearance! I want them to grow up! And yes, I still chase the resident old fart around the house until he catches me–all in the name of research, or course. Dirty old lady? I don’t think so–just someone doing what comes naturally!
by Kate Douglas · August 27th, 2008 at 6:15 pmCassie, eeew to actually going home with them!
Amy, Harrison is still yum.
Dani, 6 years isn’t bad. And yes, we got out! And it was goood.
Kate, 60 isn’t old! And you write those sexy books oh so fantastic, so you can’t ever stop! I think you and your hubby sound so cute!
See the men in their 60′s were drooling over a barely legal and that had me gagging a bit!
by Shelli Stevens · August 27th, 2008 at 6:21 pmFlirting keeps me young, but I have limits when it comes to younger women. Especially since I’m used to being with older women.
by R.J. Lebeau · August 29th, 2008 at 2:17 amOh…young guys are so hot!!! Especially a young guy with nice abs. But yes…I do cut the age limit at 21. Below that is dangerous territory. Thank goodness I work in a middle school and not a high school. Middle school boys are boys who want to be men but still act like infants. That keeps me grounded.
My hubby is 5 1/2 years younger than me…so yes…I’ll forever be an old lady chasing after a younger man. 
by Lyric James · August 30th, 2008 at 4:16 pmR.J., that’s fabulous! Love to hear that
Lyric, aah you and your hubby sound so cute!
by Shelli Stevens · September 1st, 2008 at 12:33 am
well i admit to being a dirty old woman of 40, though i also admit, i do feel strange thinking, oooo he is cute, then like that old man, thinking dang he is just a tad older than my daughter or he is younger than my daughter (my oldest is almost 21) so i stick to younger but not wayyy young
by tami blackroze37 · September 1st, 2008 at 8:03 pmo yea, my worse half is 16 yrs OLDER than me, so i have teased him for years, than, well first, i said, 2 18 yrs old, for his age, and then 2 19 yrs old, but dang now 2 27 yrs old? no im going for stamia and youngLOL
by tami blackroze37 · September 1st, 2008 at 8:06 pmLOL! You’re too funny, Tami! I guess it’s normal to think the ‘they’re my kid’s age’ it’s the whole saying it aloud in a dirty tone…eek!
by Shelli Stevens · September 2nd, 2008 at 2:44 am