December 24th, 2008 | by Sasha White |
I should probably tell you all some behind the scenes tidbit about my December release PRIMAL MALE, but instead, I just want to say I hope you all have a wonderful Holiday Season. Here’s some tips to help you enjoy!
1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday
buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots,
leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It’s rare. You cannot find
it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000
calories in every sip? It’s not as if you’re going to turn into an eggnog-oholic
or something. It’s a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It’s later than
you think. It’s Christmas!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That’s the whole point of gravy.
Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed
potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they’re made with skim milk or whole
milk. If it’s skim, pass. Why bother? It’s like buying a sports car with an
automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your
eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people’s
food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year’s. You
can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for
long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a
10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted
Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them
and don’t budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of
attention. They’re like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind,
you’re never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple,Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you
don’t like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When
else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it’s loaded with the mandatory
celebratory calories, but avoid it at all costs. I mean, have some
standards.
10. One final tip: If you don’t feel terrible when you leave the party or get
up from the table, you haven’t been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over,
but hurry: January is just around the corner.
Oh Sasha! I love you! Thanks for permission for all my fave things.
Have a merry merry, friend.
Bonnie
by Bonnie Edwards · December 24th, 2008 at 3:58 pmI love fruitcake! All good advice here!
by Kate Pearce · December 24th, 2008 at 7:04 pmWhat a great post, Sasha! I loved it! LOL. You crack me up. Although, can’t stand eggnog, makes me wanna ralph. I’m just not an egg person.
But I’m way ahead of you on the not exercising thing until New Years. I figure I can add that to my resolution, to lose the 5lbs I probably gained over the holidays. Not to mention I’ve been snowed in though!
by Shelli Stevens · December 24th, 2008 at 9:45 pmOh and Happy Holidays/Merry Christmas!
by Shelli Stevens · December 24th, 2008 at 9:46 pmMerry Christmas, Ladies!
by Sasha · December 25th, 2008 at 1:04 amHere! Here!! I agree totally, except for the eggnog. I’ll make up for that with something else (maybe fudge or divinty). Merry Christmas to All!
by Janet H · December 25th, 2008 at 5:55 pm[...] your holiday season? Did you get what you wanted for a present? Not shop at all? Or did you do as Sasha suggested and drink a ton of eggnog? [...]
by Aphrodisia Authors :: Blog » Blog Archive » Holiday Hangover · December 27th, 2008 at 12:18 am